What if success has nothing to do failure? What if success has nothing to do any of the factors we often attribute it to, namely hard work or luck. What if success has everything to do with making calculating decisions that put you in the best position to succeed? Or what if some people are just more apt to succeed than others?
I don’t think we’re ready to have that conversation because that would burst a lot of bubbles.
Hard work is easy to quantify in hours, push-ups, page-count. Anyone can work hard.
Luck takes no effort, it either happens or not.
And admitting some people are just more wired to succeed than others goes against the very fabric of our participation trophy culture. It would hurt too many feelings.
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It's true: we're sharing more than we ever have; and the way we relate to our physical world has changed dramatically. And it does feel really narcissistic. And sometimes really troubling.
But here's the thing. The idea of narcissism far pre-dates Kim Kardashian. Its origins go back to Greek mythology. So I fundamentally disagree that we're any more narcissistic than before (before whenever). And I don't think technology is the enemy (just like the printing press, radio, TV, Elvis and Polaroids weren't the enemy).
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Boys:
Every so often I go through phases where I think about you guys a lot.
That came out wrong ... I think about you all the time.
But there are moments - as fleeting as a few seconds staring at you on stage during the umpteenth holiday assembly; as long as a week I don't see you; or during times of my own transition - when I think about your lives on a more profound level. What you'll be. What you'll believe. What you'll do. What you'll know.
I inevitably find myself at a loss for predicting your future lives, because as someone I know likes to say, it's all unknowable.
I also find myself at a loss for giving you advice. I can't pretend to know what you'll need, when you'll need it, or that I'd even have the answer. I know nothing, really (that's actually the greatest thing I know). I find most people who dole out advice are actually trying to work through their own issues.
Instead what I do is collect thoughts here and there, and every so often put them on paper. I've got them in previous blog posts, in an email folder marked "boys" and in my brain. They are nothing more than things I know. Pretty simple.
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